i sat in the blaze, the fire changed colours -
watched it twist & squirm, it blew up, and died away
with the fire, I changed too - my hair burnt to a toast,
& my faith in humanity vanished with our home,
is it really our home now that she is dead?
my home? - not home, my house, my burnt house.
she died without knowing how much I love her,
It ended before I could show her the world,
before I could fulfil every promise I made,
maybe I should have fought harder, or done something -
anything, why didn’t I save her? Why didn’t I die?
like Olivia says, “all I ever want to be is enough for you”
you did leave me there crying, & you were gone.
medication kept me alive for the next few months,
then revenge took place as primary motivator,
& when the world didn’t deliver on justice,
I met them, a person who I didn’t really know -
I think they like the anonymity, they sat & heard me,
It was just the two of us, me & them - no distraction,
A few days later, justice was served, the culprits -
Came to the ‘Thana’ & surrendered, when asked,
“they said it was safer here than to face that person”
when I heard the news, I ran out to the garden,
I danced, & smiled for the first time since that day.
